Smart (my arse!)

I think I mentioned in my first post that a friend had suggested keeping a Blog after I'd ranted at length in an e-mail about so-called "Smart" cars. Well, I don't mean to be obsessive or anything but ... OMG!

I've despised these vehicles since I first set eyes on one, however many years ago it was they were spawned, but I've always tried to keep my disdain contained to a sneer and maybe a contemptuous "Pah!" since one of my many motto's is "Live and let live" (which reminds me ... would James Bond be seen dead in one of these things? Would he ####!")

No more though. My contempt has finally boiled and bubbled over into outright disgust and hatred as a result of nearly being squished not once, but THREE poxy times by a "Smart" car driver, the latest attempt on my life having occurred this morning as I was innocently walking to work - and before you ask ... no it wasn't my own fault! I was strictly observing pedestrian etiquette as always, but for some reason "Smart" car drivers see me and lose control, usually while accelerating. Giving the drivers the benefit of the doubt (even though they all look like Social Workers and are clearly mad as a box of frogs) maybe it was the gentle autumn breeze who was to blame, maybe a slight gust was just a little too much in the North, enough to pick up Noddy's car and send it hurtling my way. I don't know, what I DO know is that I REFUSE to be terminated (well OK, slightly maimed) by such an embarrassing piece of design. So no more Mrs. Nice Lady!

The makers have been trying to convince the British public for some time now that THIS is the car you want to be seen in if you want to be perceived as hip and trendy and a caring friend of the environment, (when in fact all you will look is retarded and cramped). Did the designer actually design a full car? Did the manufacturers just think "well that's a bit wank, looks like something you'd get in a cereal box!" and stop half way through making them? Just quickly stuck the rear's on with a bit of superglue?

They're lame. They irritate me. The people who buy and drive them irritate me - for some inexplicable reason they all have this smug look, like they seriously think people are going to see them in their spazzy little cars and think "Woah! That's so smart! Damn I wish I had one!!" NO! I don't want one .. I don't even want to be associated with someone who has one, I don't think you're cool for buying one I think you're an idiot ...and no, I don't care if it is the "sporty-convertible" version ... that's even lamer ... now go buy a proper car!!!

And that's all I have to say about that.

*This rant was brought to you by the letters F and U and the number 6.